“I thought there’d be stars. We are abandoned.”
Another year, another 31 Days of Frights! This time around, I started off the gauntlet with a modern horror classic: The Cabin in the Woods. This was one that I knew vaguely about, but it felt like a good October tone-setter.
TCitW begins as your standard teen slasher flick. We have the bimbo, jock, nerd, stoner, and virgin heading out on a harmless summer trip, only to run into unsettling old men and mysterious coincidences. There’s a reason they’re falling into the usual stereotypes, and it doesn’t bode well for anyone involved!
In the little I knew prior about TCitW, I thought “it’s all a giant sandbox!” would be the massive twist, but we meet the architects behind this haunted house before we meet the teens. They might not know what’s happening, but the audience is aware every step of the way, even as we wonder about the reasoning behind it.
I enjoyed how much this movie made fun of such popular tropes, acknowledging them while playing into them along the way. The “we should split up” part was great, and that motorcycle scene – now that’s how you do a slasher!
I was surprised, given the purposeful and overly-enhanced clicheness of the core cast, that I felt so strongly for them. They were amusing, endearing, and genuinely funny.
Spoilers from here onward!
“Let’s get this party started!”
I was delighted when Marty managed to be the sole survivor next to Dana – his bong immunizing him to the drug gas was fantastic! And Chekov’s gun was fired so many times during the elevator scene, followed by that sweet sweet revenge against every worker in the building! God, that scene of the elevators opening and everyone getting wrecked was so fucking terrifying! I completely relate with the lady just full on shooting herself in the head – what else would you do in that scenario??
And hey, at least we finally got to see the regular zombies!
As the bodies piled up, I waited for the final twist. I half-expected a super meta reveal where us the viewers were the “ones below” who needed blood and gore to be satisfied and not turn off the TV, but alas. But Sigourney Weaver showing up felt like a twist in and of itself!
I’d been wondering if Dana not being a virgin would be revealed as an oversight by the whole company, causing her not to fit their trope and messing up the whole system. But no, Sigourney Weaver says they knew her and she was “close enough,” which is a nice twist on the premise!
Dana and Marty’s friendship and their mutual decision to let the world burn was an absolutely fantastic ending – so much tastier than one of them angistily killing the other for the sake of humanity! This movie is iconic for a reason, and it’s already one of my favorites! We’re starting October off strong this year!
